Sunday, August 26, 2012

fruit stripe gum cupcake toppers

guys, i think my camera hates me.
i can hear the camera scream 
"OH NO! NOT HER AGAIN!" 
when i pick it up. it knows i don't allow it to slack and as soon as that battery percentage goes down to 20%, 
i head for the charger.
i dropped it once, 
or maybe it was trying to escape from me,
so now it goes 
chica.chica.chica.chica.chica.
when i turn the power on.
i have no idea what that sound means.

i just think one day it may go
but until then, i fully intend on working it to its death, which i hope will be never.

poor thing.

so, since i have a habit of being long and drawn out on some of my posts, and my projects are also long and drawn out, with tons of pics and forever time to put them all together, 
i have decided to do a simple and wordless (kinda) tutorial.

check it out :)
for birthdays.
or any party.
or just for smiles.
do you like them?
why,
make some today! 
:)
 y'know, there are only 9,562,142 possible designs you can make with this pretty awesome pretty gum that would be uh...
awesome.

and that's just on cupcakes!

what about on top of cookies?
or bars? 
or cakes? 
or brownies? 
or cake pops? 
or, or, or....

think i'll save those other possibilities
for you. 
and besides that, taking pictures of all those possibilities would really kill my camera! 



Wednesday, August 22, 2012

6 months and counting...

aw, c'mon.

i know you wanna look.
i mean it has no flippin' lock.

but it's probably worthless since hackers can basically find anything about you, steal your identity, and have 12 krispy kreme donuts in the morning without a hint of guilt.

so the lock is useless.

sigh.

go ahead and read if you must.



to be continued...





Friday, August 17, 2012

boo boo bandaid brownies

wanna know what happens when 2 worlds collide?
like my nursing job and blogging?

this.

a story kinda copied from that little mouse who is given a cookie.
here goes.

if you give a kid a last day of summer, 
he's bound to want to play.
and when he plays, he will be thirsty, 
so he'll need a glass of milk.
chances are he will want to go back to playing and hurriedly take a drink, 
spilling some milk on the floor.
when he spills the milk on the floor, 
he will most likely pretend he never knew he did it.
and in his haste of getting caught by the annoyed parent, 
he runs off.
so while he is running off, 
he will fall.
and when he falls from slipping on the milk, 
he will cry.
and when he cries, 
he will want his mommy or daddy. 
so his mommy or daddy will come and 
make a quick run to the medicine cabinet,
and grab that all important item.
but the child will still continue to cry.
and when the child keeps crying,
mommy or daddy will have to calm him down.
and when the parent tries to calm their child down, 
they will have to say something.
 

and when they say something, it will be coated with a lot of sugar.
and when the child sees what the parent has done, 
and what the parent says,
the child will smile, 
immediately feel better,
and the child,
will want to play,
again.


DIRECTIONS
you'll need:
brownie mix (whatever kind you like)
parchment paper
knife
Q-shaped cookie cutter (FOUND HERE)
white candy bark
pink candy food coloring (make sure it's CANDY coloring!)
sprinkles
light corn syrup

1. take 1 box of brownie mix and pour enough to cover a loaf pan and an 8x8 pan covered first with parchment paper for easy removal. bake as directed.

2. once the brownies are cool, cut the square pan brownies with a Q-shaped cookie cutter. it's enough to make 3 cartoon bubbles. of course you can eat your scraps.

3. then slice your cooled loaf pan brownies into rectangles. set all the cut brownies aside.

4. grab some sprinkles for the faces.

5. melt some candy bark and color it pink.

6. dip your cooled brownies in the candy. plop a large amount on top of the brownie as well.

7. shake the brownie til the candy falls over it evenly then score the bottom with a toothpick.

8. add the face quickly with a tweezers before the candy dries.

9. poke the bandaid holes with a toothpick. if the candy is already dried, just brush the shaved crumbs off the top of the brownie.

10. next take the cartoon bubble and plop melted white candy over it, shake til evenly covered, and score the bottom again.

11. once all dried, write your sentiment with food markers. (awww, you're so nice!)

12. you can brush some corn syrup on the edge of the cartoon bubble and add some sprinkles for more color and of course, more sugar.

now eat up and tell that kid to clean up that spilled milk already!

but first give him a big smooch on the cheek.













Tuesday, August 14, 2012

plain white tray makeover

ms. white tray?
yes, morning. i, ummm, so so sorry i am late.
(rolls eyes) i see you have an appointment today 
with heidi k. at 9 am.
yes....yes i do.

                                               well it's 8:59 am. you are lucky 
                            heidi canceled her project ruinway meeting. 
                              she is a very very busy woman you know.
i'm sorry.  (looks down) 
i tried to be here earlier but i 
couldn't decide what to wear.


so i see you decided to wear nothing at all?     

well, i figure heidi can start from scratch...maybe?
(gives sheepish grin)
whatever. go to room number 12. fill out the paperwork and wait.
you are very very lucky we even kept your appointment.

yes, yes, m'aam.

ms. tray walks into room. there lies a packet of information needed to begin the process.

she quickly scribbles down what she could muster, as she was already flustered by her tardiness and the front receptionist witch lady.

she reads & answers some of the questions:

what brings you to our salon?
i'm desperate for a makeover
what ideas do you have in mind?
something glitzy, glamorous. knock your socks off kinda thing...
tell us a little about your fashion history in 5 sentences or less.
i was bought by a nice lady at jo ann fabrics. the nice lady was excited when she bought me but now she just leaves me to collect dust and says i am boring. originally i was $12.99 but then i was marked down 70%, making me just $3.90.  oh i feel so cheap!

just then, heidi k. and 2 assistants walk in.
heidi takes a 0.004 second glance at ms. white tray, nods to the assistants, says "give her the works",
and leaves.

the assistants get to work.

first they take the mod podge
and slather it all over her front in random splotches here and there.
"oooo! that tickles" she says.

then they take some of this stuff:
and pour it all over her lower front, 
over the wet modge podge.
and flip ms. tray this way and that, making her quite dizzy. 
there was no distinct pattern to the flipping, it was way random.

 then they held her upside down and shook her some more. 
ms. tray was getting a little worried 
what she would look like. 
and why weren't there any mirrors in the room anyway?

then they leave ms. tray alone for 30 minutes. 

when they come back, they slather her 
again with the modge podge. 

ms. tray is feeling pretty good now and just when ms. tray thinks she's almost done, 
they add a finishing touch.
a party sign.
made from stick on letters and black cardstock.
the assistants slap more modge podge, let ms. tray alone for another 30 minutes or so, then slap another layer of modge podge on. 

they leave ms.tray alone again but this time a whole hour goes by.

ms. tray is anxious...very anxious at her new look.
will i look alright?
will nice lady start bringing me to her parties?
will i continue to be a dust collector?
where the heck is that darn mirror?

the thoughts ran wild, and just when she 
couldn't take it anymore,
the assistants came in and took her 
to another room with a mirror.

and she is reminded of what she came as, 
and what she was leaving as.
and she took a closer look at herself.
but they must warn her 
before she got too excited.
they tell her, nothing edible should touch or come into contact with her makeover. 
nothing edible.
unless, she places something between her and whatever treat she wants with a piece of wax paper, a cupcake liner, or small doiley or whatever, 
and she'll be good to go.
and if it isn't something edible, 
she's really good to go.

ms. white tray was pleased. 
she made a mental note to go the courthouse the next day to change her name to 
"ms. i got it going on tray"

and realized at that point, 
when you got potential, use it.
and she never looked back again.